Rainbow Records

by Hidden Pictures

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02:45
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03:20

credits

released 17 July 2012
Richard Gintowt wrote some songs and played well with others. Michelle Gaume Sanders sang and whacked a marching glockenspiel. Erik Voeks played bass because we told him we’d never release this. Cameron Hawk beat those drums to a bloody pulp. Nate Holt played piano but made more money with his Journey tribute band. Corey Vitt showed up late but brought beer so we let him play on songs 5 and 10. Mike Nolte engineered drums and bass at More Famouser and never once ate Big Bam’s. Ed Rose mixed the whole mess at an undisclosed location and dropped it off discreetly at the Bourgeois Pig. Doug Van Sloun applied corrective equalization and dynamic enhancement at Focus Mastering. Patrick Giroux designed this tangible object on very little sleep. Please direct all complaints to hiddenpicturesmusic.com.

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Track Name: Calling Christine
Christine, are you stuck in a boring routine?
Christine, it’s so hard to get out on the scene
Christine, I think you need a new defense
‘Cause your story don’t make no sense

Calling Christine to the stand
Calling Christine, what’s your plan?

Christine, your contempt of this court is obscene
Christine, do you like the Smiths or the Smithereens?
Christine, do you plead insanity?
Was your temperament just temporary?

Teena Marie and Big Country really take you back
If I wrote a song named after my band, would you dig the track?
‘Cause dreams stay with me
But I cannot stay with you
Track Name: Evil Kangaroo
Last night I had a dream that we never broke up
And I just hadn’t called you for three or four years
And I found it odd that I’d forgotten
That our love was so rotten
And it made me feel sad

So get out, get out
I don’t wanna see you no more
In my early morning paramnesia storm
‘Cause you broke me in two like an evil kangaroo
So please stop knocking and hopping on my grave

And in my dream I was so angry
I punched you like a baby
Would punch at a cat
Sometimes I feel it’s inappropriate
The way I keep approaching it
Like a vampire bat

Just go away
Just go
Track Name: Solo Record Shop
Here’s a song for when I’m 65
And I have no talents to recognize
So lock it up in a safety deposit
Along with the others to make a composite sketch
Of those 15 to 25 years
When you had it, ‘til it disappeared
And your solo records were shunned
But you kept on
At the solo record shop

I don’t care what you say
I’m gonna write my best song today

Here’s a song for when I’m 35
And after all those years I hit my stride
We’ll celebrate with some fake gold records
And order up a round of precipitous decline
But I told you I never bought in
To your incredulous procession of pins
It’s so hard to believe that it’s true
So I’ll meet you
At the solo record shop

I don’t care what you say
I won’t burn out
I’ll fade away
Track Name: Say Hello to Darkuary
Fear not, the days will grow short
And the nights will get colder and colder
Chip up, pretend that you’re tough
And the world will offer you a shoulder

Take note, the sun is asleep
And the moon gets closer and closer*
Three months form a symphony
That lacks a passionate composer

So come inside and say you’re mine

Say hello to Darkuary
It’s colder than shit and it’s scary
If you’re alone it’s just dreadful
But if you’re in love it’s eventful

Hook up with someone who’s warm and do not go out until Easter
Stock up on vitamin D and be sure to fill the birdfeeder

I’ve been sworn to keep you warm
Track Name: Boyfriend A.D.D.
You can’t finish a game of Monopoly
You can’t finish a movie
You can’t finish any of these things
So why would you finish me?
You can’t focus a telephoto lens
Can’t put up with my friends
You wrote a letter that you didn’t even send
To tell me when the party ends

Boyfriend, boyfriend A.D.D.
You don’t give a damn for me
Even when I’m pulling teeth
You’re just sleeping gracefully

You can’t finish up your S.A.T.
Can’t rearrange the marquee
You couldn’t even get your G.E.D.
In ever understanding me

Boyfriend, boyfriend A.D.D.
Are you even listening?
Do I have to make a scene?
Do you need a new routine?
Track Name: Rainbow Records
When I was a little bitty kid, yeah
I rocked some NKOTB
But I never thought I’d see the day
That NKOTBSB

When I was a truant eighth grader
I rocked a little GNR
But I never thought I’d rue the day
That Axl Rose played guitar*

There’s no going back to Rainbow Records
We disbanded the fanclub on account of the hecklers

When I was a freshman in high school
We rocked a little XRT
We played songs with three chords yeah
AC/DC/D

So face the facts
Your favorite tracks are Time Life memories
Or even worse, fatefully cursed
As bargain DVDs
Have you sold all your CDs?
Track Name: Ricky
Oh Ricky you want to go outside and smell the air
How can I explain to you what danger lurks out there?
But you don’t care, all day you stare
And wait for doors to open that never do
Oh Ricky I know I’m not the first lover you had
Long ago my dear wife’s brother loved you like a dad
But he went away on business, and quickly you grew restless
And it was hard to do, but it was best for you to move on

And so it was you came into my house to stay
And rootless as you were, your heart began to purr
But it could not be sated, and it could not be caged
And slowly you began to drift away

Oh Ricky I want the best for you
But left to your devices you’re a tinderbox
And oh Ricky I want the best for you
You know not what you harvest and set fire to
Track Name: Let's Get On With It Already
Let’s get on with it already
Let’s get to the good stuff
You don’t have to feel unsteady
You don’t have to act tough
Let’s get on with it already
Let’s say the big words
Enough of going steady
That’s for the young birds

Ready or not here it comes
You used all your twos and your ones
You’re acting too young for your age
You can’t say it’s only a stage
You can’t say

Let’s get on with it already
Let’s let the truth in
Just flip it like a penny
Heads or tails you and I win

Ready or not here we are
And I locked the keys in the car
I hid your last hideaway
In hopes that you’d agree to stay
Everyday

You can even walk away
When you need a holiday
I will leave the door unlocked
My love is a vacant lot
Track Name: Swim
It’s just business as usual
It’s not business, it’s casual
And you’ll need a publicist
If you’re gonna publish this
‘Cause we all believe in you
The press release says we do
A cloud that you can’t see through
Of bullshit we’re feeding you

So swim, do the backstroke baby
Swim, swim away safely
Swim, do the backstroke baby
Now the ship’s going down

It’s just business as usual
In this business it’s ritual
It becomes a spectacle
It’s hardly respectable
It’s simply tyrannical
My heart ain’t mechanical
It goes where it wants to go
It flows where it wants to flow

So I want my lunch money back
I can’t invest in this heart attack
All your promises they never come true
You’re gonna need to stay after school
If you can’t hear it, should I turn it up?
Track Name: You Don't Have To Do That
Girl, I’ve loved you for a long long time
Girl, I tried to put my love on the line
I loved you for a minute and you loved me back for a year
So I loved you for an hour, and then you disappeared

But you don’t have to go knocking
You don’t have to do that
You don’t have to go knocking
To keep me coming back

Girl, I turn my head when you walk by
Girl, don’t wanna see you with another guy
But you’re spending all my money, and you know that it’s true
One of these days it’s gonna catch up to you

I hardly even know you but I know enough to say
I wanna be around you every night and every day
Track Name: It's Just Me (and I'm Sorry)
How can you trust a girl that you stole from another man?
Each time she tells you she wants you it sounds like she wants your friends
How can you trust a boy who’s notorious for breaking hearts?
Each time he tells you he loves you it just sounds like martial arts

But despite what you’ve been told
Loving’s never gonna get old
And despite what you might think
He loves you more than anything

How could you doubt a girl who describes you in perfect detail?
Each time you act like an asshole she writes you a bill of sale
How could you stand a man who regards you as perfectly flawed?
Each time you act like a sick psychopath he just stands to applaud

But despite what you’ve been told
Loving him is gonna get old
And despite what you might think
You are prettier than you used to be

Oh some girls might call me a crook
But I tried every trick in my book
But I saved my best trick for you
‘Cause I do
I do
Track Name: Oldies 104.3
It makes her angry when she turns into the oldies station
And all she hears is disco music and desperation
More Supremes, less Springsteen
More British Invasion, less pretty persuasion

You’re breaking the rules
You need to go back to school
Your new format’s a drag
You’re making my girl mad

I’m not getting any younger I don’t harbor illusions
I’m like a manager who used up all his substitutions
But all the kids are missing out
Wake up little Susie, time’s running out

You’re only scratching the surface
The past hour was worthless
I hardly know why I listen
I just miss what I’m missing

Oldies 104.3
It’s the end of you and me
I guess you grew up too fast
I liked you better in the past

Oldies 104.3
It’s the end of you and me
It’s hard to make a good thing last
When your future is in the past